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Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Emotional Torture My Sister Has Been Going Through

This is quite personal, please do understand me if I didn't manage to keep it myself. Though I didn't want to talk and share about it here, but I feel as though I needed you guys most this time.

This is all about my 4th sister, Mitch is her name, 21 years old...
She is indeed a lovely young lady! (as you can see on her sweet pose, photo below)...She is a nursing student, and next year would be her last year in university, without knowing that along her path, she'll bump into this rocky road. I REALLY FEEL DEVASTATED AT THE MOMENT! Though on the other hand, I also wanted to give her hugs I wish I was in the Philippines, if I only could to stay beside her, and can give emotional and moral support which I think she needed it most this point in time. I don't think she deserves to go through this, she's still too young to understand what true love means.... But I know everything has a reason! Only God knows what's the final outcome after the heartaches she had to go through...

All my 3 sisters are spending their university courses in Manila (right after my other 2 older sisters finished theirs in Manila too). We are from Bohol (t'was a long story why I decided to have all of them to stay in Manila and spend their university there), while my both parents are in Bohol, they just visit them every now and then. She used to be a happy lady, every time I went home to spend my 1 month vacation, we used to go around, shopping and a real sisters bonding! I have really missed those times now that I go home to UK with hubby....

I was told by one of them that she had boyfriend, but they never saw him. The reason was, he was quite a shy guy, whether it was true or not then I don't really know. I only get second stories from them, the rest was always to put aside. When hubby and I decided to visit them in September, I've had noticed some changes on her, she was very quite which she never used to! In fact, I truly felt guilty of not spending much time with them, we had spent more in Bohol with my parents instead.

Sometime November, my sister's American hubby was going home to Philippines to see my sister and meet my family, and had given them our Christmas present to have had another wedding in the Philippines. Obviously, all of my sisters were their attendants so they had to go home.

However, just about 2 weeks before they had flown out, this mentioned sister above (Mitch), packed up from school and one night she left with a long letter saying that she was PREGNANT, that it was the biggest mistake she had ever done in her life, that she apologized to have disappoint us, that she didn't want to cause another problem, that's why she decided to leave. Otherwise, she would have committed suicide if not thinking about her family who continues giving her moral supports! I was devastated!! My sister tried her best to find her, which she did! She stayed with the boyfriend and jetted off to Palawan for a week to meet the boyfriend's family. I was happy in the long run that the boyfriend was responsible enough to face the odds.

My sister (who looked after them) managed to convince the two of them to meet up and talk about the incident. While he willingly decided to go to Bohol with them, to present himself as my sister's boyfriend, to be our future brother-in-law, and to be my parents' future son-in-law! They all celebrated the holiday season without tears, yet full of happiness instead, plus my sister's wedding too. In short, everybody have accepted what had happened, and we all gladly have accepted him as well wholeheartedly, without any hurt feelings.

THIS IS THE FACT... frightening!!!

Then all of a sudden, what had been long kept was inadvertently became known to everybody! There's no secret would remain secret forever! My sister and her boyfriend had a fight for some reason a night they were stranded in Bohol (Talibon port) due to typhoon,
so they didn't manage to catch the flight they were supposed to be in! My sister was extremely upset and she started crying and mentioned everything what he's been doing, and what he is like in the whole period they were together! Whew... so the rest of my sisters heard everything, but before that fight, my other sister had already known all the secrets already... THAT THE BOYFRIEND HAS A SUGAR MOMMY (a 45 year old mother), whom he always brings to his boarding house in Manila with my sister. My poor and was helpless sister, nothing she can do except to CRY and CRY and CRY.... and I was told that there were couple of nights the boyfriend didn't stay with my sister in his boarding house, he stayed with his sugar mommy instead!! Sucks, I wanted to kill him!! SO IRRESPONSIBLE..... We've let her to stay with the boyfriend already since he said he was going to marry her, we trusted all he said... We all thought along the way, she's been happy with him...

....without realizing the agony she's been experiencing, the chronic pains he has been giving to her... my heart is in pain at the moment....

Luckily, they didn't manage to leave for Cebu that night, and the one who looks after my sisters had told everything to my father through text, they were so pissed off that they had to go back to Talibon to fetch her and stay away from him! So, they managed to leave back to Cebu without Mitch! They told me she was in tears... They arrived Cebu and went straight to the airport, but unfortunately, Cebu Pacific didn't seem want to let them fly without paying the whole amount per person. They've lost the flight, so THANK YOU VERY MUCH! Yea, well.. and now they are still in Cebu, only Wednesday was the cheapest they could get to fly back to Manila and there was 5 of them! They had to wait together with the boyfriend.. he was so angry and pissed off of what is happening to them, him and my sister had a rawl last night because he wanted to leave and go back to Manila ASAP!!!

Then without knowing that he's still be in contact with his sugar mommy, that he asked her to come and fetch him in Cebu, he asked her to send him money. Why on earth, we met this guy and blamed us in the end of bringing him to Bohol!!

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22 comments:

Melissa said...

What an awful position your sister is in. I hope that she does what is best for her and her baby. It is good that she let you guys know what was going on before she married her boyfriend.

Mira said...

I feel sorry for your sister that she had to go through all these at her very delicate stage. But it was a blessing in disguise to know what kind of a person her bf was, she's given a preview of what life she'll have if she marries him.

Dhemz said...

I remember when you mentioned this before dangs..and I know how devastated you are as a sister. Kabilabi ba sad nga laki..bagaa sad nya ug nawong noh...lami ba kayo ipabarang ah...hheeh! when man manganak imo bb sis dangs? I hope someday she will realize na sometime wag pailaran ang puso...kwaa nalang to sis...hhehehe! I hope it will get better soon...you are a great manang..hehhe!

Lanie said...

So sorry about this happening to your sister, but you know what, try to help her to go through to have her baby and after she give birth, Let her finish one year of her nursing. You have to all support her, glad she didn't marry the bf of her because she might suffer later.

Umma said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Umma said...

Hello sistah. my intuition was right while I was reading the first part of your post about your younger sister. I was so right after I read the full story.. I can relate bec this is a very common dilemma of an older sister to almost every younger sister.

Cguro sis wa jud experience ang younger sister mo of having boyfriends in the past ay? Mao ang kuyaw sina kay medyo naive ang pag isip when in terms sa heart. Madali ra ma-into ug guys especially those tam-is ug dila.

See,Kahibalu na jud xia about his bf extra curricular activities but still she continued their relationship. Cguro lami man jud ang guy mag-into or pasalig ba.

Hay buhay talaga oi! Kasakit man ana mag pinsar di ba especially it happened to one of your family. Unsaon ta na lang ni sis..kundi support your younger sister since she is in delicate condition. Apektado ra ba ang baby pag sige man jud xia cry ana oi.

At least na lang, wala pa nakasal sila duha otherwise it will be a big mistake.. Mahal ra ba magpa -annul di ba?

Just extend your comfort to her na lang sis kay wala naman kita may mahimo kay naa na ang situation. Dont worry about na lang what other people would say about her being impregnated. who cares, labot nila, di ba?

But I just hope na di magbago ang isip ni imong sister kag mainto-an na pud ug bf nya kag mag-uliay na sad sila.

And ikaw pud sistah, dont worry too much sad kay paano ka diay majuntis ani kay sagi ka pud worry sa ilaha didto. You take care ha?

amiable amy said...

That is really sad Madz. I know you are deeply hurt right now. Just give her support. Even she made mistakes, family is her only strength. If I were her, I will think about my future and the future of the baby...But, she can think better if you as her family give her support (morally and spiritually. I know you did already. Just have more patient.

Lynn said...

so sorry to hear about your, sister. ako pa iya ate, siguro giaway na nako ng laki. hahaha. haay na lang ning mga laki. so unfortunate kay sa kadaghang laki, siya pa jud na met sa imo sister.

anyways, hopefully everything will be okay soon, sis. nga magbag-o ng laki. hinaut unta. :)

Umma said...

sistah, I just deleted my other comment here bec it was double - same content comment anyway.

Puerteng laba-a pa jud parehas lang pud og content. Musta na?

tarek alghnam said...

The story of a difficult life
But always easy to be difficult after
Very sad story
Greetings to you
And calls timidly happy
I hope to visit my blog

ryliej said...

Hi sis, despite of what happened to your sister sis, I am still glad that she didn't commit suicide. I hope and pray the your sister and her baby will be healthy all the time..

I have a sister whom I sent to college too but decided to qui so she could work but ended up being pregnant and now she is living with Mama because the guy who impregnated her disappeared. I was furious but nothing we can do but to support and understand them because they are our siblings..

Joops said...

Sorry about what happened to your sister, the same thing happened to my wife's sister in the Philippines.

btw, i am now following your blog..

[ k r y k ] said...

aww. pa comment po Ü

kaLoka naman yung nangyari sa sisterm mo. haissst. i sure sobrang in Love siya taLga dun sa guy.
whew'!

men are really girl's problem. tssk!

Madz said...

Sistah Umma this is what they call LOVE IS BLIND! haaayyy gugmang giatay ikanga.. In fact, she said that he is not going to change, she'll leave him! When?? after they'll get married?

The worse thing about my sister is, she doesn't talk, she doesn't say much that I don't want this, I don't want that.. that etc, etc, etc,,, you know what I mean???

Madz said...

Hi Melissa, thanks sistah for your comment! Yea otherwise it would have been late for us to realize how evil this guy is, and suffer in the end!

I knew I had a doubt feeling when my both parents proposed to the guy of having a Civil wedding in two weeks' time!! Hello... what if it did happen even before we knew about his secrets!!

Rechie said...

Sad to to know about what happened to your sister Ate Madz. I know it would be hard for her to just forget everything but i hope she will be able to get through all the pain that the guys have caused her. I do understand how u feel about it as an elder sister since like you, i am also an elder sister to two. I just hope that she will keep the baby, that way she will inspired and see more on the beauty of life. Screw that guy..he is..hmmppp The Nerve!

Madz said...

What get's me on about this guy is, he pretends to be an angel and a very good guy in front of my other sisters, while he is killing my sister gradually emotionally!

It was then a very good idea to have allowed my other sisters to stay with her in her bf's boarding house, to have discovered everything!! I thought all the while that everytime they stay over, the bf was also there, without knowing that he was staying with his SUGAR MOMMY!!

Ipabarang jud ka nako do!! gamay nlng kag kuwang...

Madz said...

Do you want to know the latest about the guy? HE LEFT FROM MY AUNTIE'S PLACE IN CEBU WHERE THEY STAYED WHILE WAITING FOR THEIR FLIGHTS TO GO BACK TO MANILA!! But before that he contacted his SUGAR MOMMY to fly and fetch him to Cebu, so he stayed at the airport while waiting for her!

However, due to the fact that he only so much money that he couldn't afford to buy a one way ticket, HE HEADED TO BOHOL BACK IN OUR ISLAND INSTEAD!! Pretending to have missed my sister, you know what my father did since he arrived late last night, he didn't allow him to sleep inside our house...

Good for you tsong!!! but sad about my sister, she doesn't eat anymore, she doesn't talk, she's just crying all the time!!!

Madz said...

Before he left Cebu, he called my other sister and told her that he wanted to fly back to Manila, and that his mother said not to marry Mitch anymore! Meaning he does what his mother says!!!! What kind of guy he is????

PLUS, MIND YOU GUYS... HIS SUGAR MOMMY IS HIS MOTHER'S FRIEND!!! uurrrrggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Juliana said...

so sorry to hear this Madz. as crazy as it may sound to you, I think this is happening for a reason: him showing his true colors NOW.

call it a blessing in disguise, because even if your sister is heavy now, I think she's better off without this guy in her life.

the baby is and will always be a blessing. and with you, the family rallying behind her, she should be able to move on without him.

hugs to your sister.

Madz said...

Hi Juliana, thanks for dropping by and leaving some notes in here! YES you are right, her baby would be a great blessing to you family! We all decided for her to stay with my parents and not go back to Manila with the boyfriend, because both his sugar mommy and her mother were after only of her baby! They're so evil and so selfish!!

Anyway, I know God has a message behind this incident..

Madz said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
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